


Tokyo 817

by dumbochan



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV) Fusion, Cop AU, Getting Together, M/M, Merry Christmas Kiku!, Stupid Rivalries
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-25
Updated: 2018-12-25
Packaged: 2019-09-27 01:27:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,288
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17152727
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dumbochan/pseuds/dumbochan
Summary: Kuroo feels like there’s some… unfair treatment going around precinct 817. First, his captain is going on some super cool yet kind of boring vacation, and puts Iwaizumi in charge when he’s just as capable. Second, Iwaizumi, the bastard, puts him on a B&E case with Sawamura! Rude!Or alternatively, Kuroo has a major crush on Sawamura, and uses this fake rivalry to cope.





	Tokyo 817

**Author's Note:**

  * For [angel_with_a_scythe](https://archiveofourown.org/users/angel_with_a_scythe/gifts).



> Merry Christmas Kiku! Here is my gift to you! I hope you enjoy it.

“Captain! So I’ve been thinking…” Oikawa begins during their daily morning meeting, “I think it’s time we make this precinct… a little more lively? I’m suggesting new lights, brighter colors, ooh, new coffee machine. We should get a Nespresso.”

“Do you know how expensive Nespresso capsules are? What a waste of money! A Keurig is obviously the better buy!” Kuroo complains. 

“A Keurig?? What kind of low-class nonsense is that?” Oikawa counters, “Why settle for boring breakfast blends when you can have a Master origin brew from Ethiopia, Indonesia, or India!” 

“This conversation is going nowhere, you don’t even drink coffee or espresso, Kuroo.” Sawamura butts in, “Plus… French press is the way to go.”

“Can you believe him, Sawamura? He suggested getting a  _ Keurig _ … the audacity.” Oikawa scoffed.

“We don’t have time for this pointless water cooler talk. We’re all gathered here to discuss something important.” Sergeant Iwaizumi announces, standing to full attention. “Captain… go ahead with the news.”

“Thank you, Sergeant. I would like everyone to know that I am going on vacation.” Captain Ushijima begins, “I’m going to tour botanical gardens around Japan for the next two weeks. It’s research for my own personal garden. I plan on making my garden so beautiful, that  _ Best Homes International _ contacts me to be the cover of one of their magazine issues.” 

“That’s amazing, Captain!” Bokuto hoots.

“That is great, Cap! Dreaming big, as always. That being said, I’m sure it’s it’s safe to say, that I’m in charge for the next two weeks.” Kuroo assumes, “I wasn’t exactly ready for this, but I do have a speech prepared.”

“Sergeant Iwaizumi is in charge while I am gone.” Captain Ushijima announces.

“Go Iwa-chan!” Oikawa claps, while Kuroo’s face falls.

“Wait, what? Cap, I thought we had something special…”

“Why would he put you in charge? You arrested the wrong guy last week.” Sawamura points out, stirring his tea. They really did need a new coffee machine, Bokuto broke the last one, and Sawamura thinks he might be getting caffeine headaches from withdrawal of his favorite beverage.

“Look, we all have bad days, Sawamura! Stop rubbing it in!” 

“Kuroo, didn’t you have a bad  _ week _ ?” Bokuto asks innocently.

“Ouch, burned by his own friend.” Oikawa tsks, reaching over to fist bump with Matsukawa.

“Can we all focus?!” Iwaizumi questions, “We all are going to wish Captain safe travels, and then carry on with our jobs because this precinct stops for no one. In fact, I have new cases to assign to you all, so shut your traps and listen up.”

 

 

 

Kuroo feels like there’s some… unfair treatment going around precinct 817. First, his captain is going on some super cool yet kind of boring vacation, and puts Iwaizumi in charge when he’s just as capable. Second, Iwaizumi, the bastard, puts him on a B&E case with Sawamura! Rude! He is so above breaking and entering cases, plus his and Sawamura’s rivalry is no secret. Kuroo aspires to be the better detective, and he has, on countless occasions, already proved that to be fact, no matter what Sawamura says. He is not happy, and it definitely doesn’t help that Oikawa and Matsukawa had a laugh at his expense for five whole minutes before telling Sawamura that they felt sorry for him. Those two shouldn’t be allowed to sit next to each other.

  
  


 

 

The drive to the crime scene is awkward. Kuroo drives the speed limit, abides by all the lights, yields to pedestrians, and Sawamura sits in the passenger seat staring at his phone the entire time. Neither of them bother with conversation, and it shouldn’t be like this between partners, but Kuroo’s pretty sure this guy hates his guts. Sure, he has to take part of that blame, after all, he isn’t always the nicest to Sawamura… usually doing whatever he can to get under the other’s skin. But honestly, that’s just the basic elementary tactic of pulling someone’s pigtails because you like them. 

  
  


It’s not often that Kuroo develops a crush on someone, and when it happens, he usually crushes hard. Crushes aren’t something he deals with, usually he just lets it fester until either it blows up in his face, or the other catches wind on it and does something about it. The problem with  _ this _ crush… is everyone else in their precinct. 817 is a tight-knit family. There’s the main detectives, there’s the forensics team, the clean up crew, the officers… if something was to happen between Kuroo and Sawamura,  _ everyone _ would know about it. Which is fine… except if it all goes wrong. Sawamura is arguably, one of the most reliable individuals in the entire precinct, and Kuroo’s sure a lot more people would side with Sawamura over him if it goes sour. Kuroo doesn’t want to be painted as a bad guy, because he genuinely means no harm… 99% of the time. 

  
  


Bottom line is… it would take a miracle for Sawamura to feel remotely the same as Kuroo, and it would take an even bigger one for Sawamura to be willing to shove all of Kuroo’s insecurities aside and actually date him. 

 

So because Kuroo is a borderline masochist, he takes to making this rivalry between them as real/annoying as he can. It’s dumb, Oikawa would have a field day, but it’s what comes easiest.

 

 

 

They arrive at the crime scene together, stepping out of the car, and putting on sunglasses like the detectives that they are. It’s game time. Sawamura knocks on the door first, and because Kuroo is petty, he knocks again when the homeowner doesn’t answer the door immediately. He ignores the side eye Sawamura throws at him and instead clears his throat. 

“Mr Kamasaki?” They question at the same time when a blonde guy answers the door with a scowl on his face. 

“Who’s asking?”

“Detectives Sawamura and Kuroo from precinct 817.” Sawamura answers, flashing his badge. “We’re here to do some investigating about a breaking and entering that occurred here Tuesday night.” Sawamura is so textbook, it’s admirable. 

“Oh right, come on in. Excuse the mess, I haven’t had time to clean up.”

“That’s fine. Great actually. We love a good mess.” Kuroo rambles. “So where were you during the B&E?”

“At my best friend’s house, he just went through a bad breakup, so I was there as a shoulder to cry on.” Kamasaki began, “they broke through my window, probably got up there through the fire escape. Stole some signed baseballs I’ve had… and my rice cooker.”

“They stole your rice cooker?? How sad.” Sawamura commented, jotting all this down in a notepad. 

“Were the baseballs of any value?” Kuroo then asked. 

“Most likely not. I coach minor league, and I have my players sign a ball after the season. They’re all a bunch of kids, so I doubt they’ll make any money if they plan on selling them.”

“Do you mind if we look around?” 

“Not at all. Please, feel free.” Kamasaki stated, “I’ll be in the living room, doing some paperwork if you need me.”

 

 

 

“I think I’ll take it from here, Sa’amura.” Kuroo states, stretching briefly before taking in his surroundings. 

“Wait, what?” Sawamura grabs him by the wrist, preventing him from taking a step too far, “What is  _ that _ supposed to mean?”

“I have the better eyes, did you even bring your glasses?” 

“Contacts exist, you moron.” Sawamura snarled, “Plus, I’m leading this case, you can’t just tell me to sit on the sidelines.”

“Y-you’re  _ leading _ this case? Since when?”

“Since we were given the case. Iwaizumi said my name first, that’s how it works. The leader is always revealed first. It’s basic protocol.” 

“I have never heard of that protocol!”

“Do you live under a rock? How have you not heard that protocol?”

“Whatever, I’m looking for some evidence.”

“No, I’m looking for some evidence, therefore, I’ll be the one taking it from here.”

“You can’t boss me around!” Kuroo complained, “I bet I’ll find more evidence than you.”

“This isn’t a game! Plus, you’re not going to win even if it was.”

“Cocky, aren’t we?”

 

It was very childish for Kuroo to suggest turning an investigation into a game, but he can’t take it back now… even if Sawamura was right and technically found more evidence than him. They found a hair sample, possible fingerprints, and… oddly, underwear. A lot of suspicion surrounding that particular find, but they’ll just ignore it for now. 

When they arrived back to the precinct, they went their separate ways; Sawamura heading to the break room with Matsukawa and Oikawa (he should really stop hanging out with those two bad influences), while Kuroo went to his buddy Bokuto’s desk. 

“Kuroo! You’re back! How was it out there? Doing field work...without me…” Bokuto questioned, a slight frown on his face. 

“You know you’re my favorite partner! Working with Sawamura was a drag.”

“Oh good, I thought you’d have more fun with him since you two flirt all the time.”

“Excuse me?? I do not flirt with Sawamura.”

“Really?” Bokuto’s eyebrows raise, “Maybe you don’t realize it, but you’re totally flirting with him. You even call each other cute pet names.”

“Sa’amura isn’t a pet name, Bo. It’s just me playing around with him. Plus he always calls me insults, like moron… or doofus. He probably got that one from Tendou in forensics.” 

“So, flirting.”

“No, not flirting… it’s...” Kuroo sighs, he’s been caught. He’s totally flirting, in his own annoying way. “Fine… it is flirting.”

“Now that you finally admit it, look, as your best buddy forever and ever… I think it’s time for a different approach.” 

“Do you now?”

“Yes, if you keep this up, he might actually start finding you annoying and therefore his crush will go away. You don’t want that.” 

“Then what do you think I should do?”

“Just ask him out! He likes ramen, animals, and fluffy things, especially bunnies or hamsters.”

“If I could just ask him out, I would have done that already.”

“You just need a little practice! Here, I’ll be Sawamura.” Bokuto smiled, standing tall and puffing out his chest.

“What are you doing?”

“Being Sawamura, duh.”

“He doesn’t stand like that.”

“Well, I can’t exactly be short…”

“This isn’t about his height, what are you doing with your chest?”

“Have you seen the pecs on that guy?? I’m playing the part pretty accurately, hey! Iwaizumi!!”

“What?” The Sergeant questioned from where he was sitting at his desk doing paperwork.

“Who am I?” Bokuto questioned, standing tall and puffing his chest again.

“Sawamura.”

“See??” Bokuto elbowed Kuroo a little too hard.

“Ugh, whatever… Sawamura...san?” Kuroo began.

“What can I do for you, Kuroo?” Bokuto questioned, trying to make his voice match Sawamura’s baritone one. Kuroo scrunched up his face in distaste, but carried on with his speech anyway.

“I was wondering if you’d like to… you know… get ramen with me?”

“I guess I wouldn’t mind… why so sudden?”

“Well, honestly, I’ve liked you for a while, just never knew how to go about it.”

“I’ve liked you too, but you’ve been quite the jerk to me, I figured it was unrequited.” 

“Bo…” 

“I’m not Bokuto, I’m  _ Sawamura _ ! Stay in character!” Bokuto hissed.

“That was just me being childish… I always revert to teasing when I don’t know what to do in certain situations. So what do you say? Will you go out with me?”

“Sure.” Kuroo’s eyes widened. He’s staring in Bokuto’s face… and his mouth didn’t move, which means….

“Sawamura’s right behind me, isn’t he?”

“Yep. Hi Sawamura!”

“Hi Bokuto!”  Sawamura waves, “Do you mind if I steal Kuroo for a minute?”

“Please, have at him.”

 

 

 

“Look, Sa’amura… I can explain…” Kuroo began as Sawamura pulled him into the break room, which was luckily sans Oikawa and Mattsun. 

“Explain what? It was pretty clear that Bokuto was pretending to be me and you were practicing asking me out.”

“...How does everyone know that Bokuto was pretending to be you? It wasn’t obvious at all!”

“It totally was.”

“Whatever, look, I…”

“Are you going to stand here and backtrack your way out of this because you’re embarrassed you got caught?”

“Maybe…”

“You don’t have to. How does after work sound? It’ll be your treat, duh, but just know… two bowls don’t exactly fill me up.”

“So, wait! We’re really doing this? You’re really going on a date...with me?”

“Yes.”

“But Sawamura… why?”

“Because you asked?”

“Yeah, but like...how long have you liked me?”

“I always thought you were cute,” Sawamura admits with a blush that flips Kuroo’s heart upside down, “And I just figured you always rivaled with me out of sheer boredom because that happens sometimes around this precinct… then Oikawa and Mattsun always insisted you were flirting, so I believed them and just waited for the right moment to confess. You just so happened to beat me to it.”

“So Oikawa and Matsukawa are good for something….”

“I’m going to tell them you said that.”

“Please don’t!”

“You can buy my secrecy if we go out for coffee after ramen.”

“Deal!”

“Great. See you later, Kuroo.” Sawamura smiles, bright, wide, genuine, and Kuroo kind of wants to kiss him. It’s so backwards, he should probably wait until after their first date, but to hell with it. Kuroo can sometimes have bad impulse control, and he’ll blame it on that, later. He leans forward, smashing his lips to Sawamura’s, definitely throwing the shorter male for a loop, yet he still kisses back. This can be the start of a beautiful relationship.

“Ugh… right in front of my salad? Really?” Hanamaki from evidence complains. Kuroo and Sawamura just ignore him. 

**Author's Note:**

> sorry it's not like super long, but i still hope you liked it anyway.


End file.
